American Samizdat

Wednesday, September 28, 2005. *
White House Municipal Park vs. Invisible Sky Monster - Who Will Win?
The city of White House, Tennessee has a Municipal Park. That Municipal Park, as one might imagine from the name, is funded by taxes. No one in White House gets to say 'pass' when it comes to paying taxes; either the people of White House pay their taxes or they go to jail. It is also the case that no on in White House gets to say 'pass' when confronted by an ordinance they don't want to follow; either the people of White House follow the law or they go to jail.

According to wftv.com, recently White House Alderman Darrel Leftwich drove by Municipal Park on a Sunday morning on his way to services at Temple Baptist Church, when saw that it was full of people at a soccer tournament. Alderman Leftwich believes that an invisible monster that lives in the sky is very, very concerned that people should not play soccer on Sunday mornings. Fair enough, people should be free to believe what they want - if Alderman Leftwich wants to mumble magic spells in a magic house on Sunday mornings while other people play soccer then that is up to him.

But the freedom of choice Alderman Leftwich treasures for himself is not one that he can afford to share with others. Alderman Leftwich has introduced an ordinance to ban the use of White House Municipal Park until afternoon hours. Keep in mind that the people of White House must follow ordinances, and it that the White House Municipal Park is maintained by public funds. Alderman Leftwich has introduced an ordinance that makes his religion into law, funded by taxes, compulsory for all.

Unfortunately for Alderman Leftwich, he must work with Alderman Farris Bibb Junior. Alderman Bibb Jr. also mumbles magic spells in a magic house to an invisible monster that lives in the sky, but the invisible monster told him that Saturday, not Sunday, is the magic no-soccer morning. Clearly, the only way to honor the freedom of religion of both Aldermen is to close Municipal Park all weekend. Maybe the tax money now not spent on Municipal Park can be given to churches or someting nice like that.

Or maybe religion is not a sound foundation for law at all.
posted by Trevor Blake at 9:03 AM
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