American Samizdat

Sunday, November 14, 2004. *
Jesus is a Busy Fellow
Jesus had time to tell Focus on the Family to give Jimmy Buffet's new album a bad review, but not enough time to focus on the families being killed in Iraq (some of whom were only visiting, and mainly reside in the good old US of A). Being killed in war is something Jesus decides - if you're on his team, you live. If you die, well, you probably deserved it. Jesus said that the appropriate responce for a principle who finds out that teenage boys like to kiss teenage girls is to be whipped in front of those boys. Jesus is also quoted as saying same sex couples should not have access to the legal rights and privilages associated with marriage in the USA. All of this is a matter of moral values: if you happen to be from another culture, with other moral values, then fuck you (and fuck you too, and you). But all this hardly matters, because Jesus told us all that the world is ending in 2005. Never mind that He's said that before - this time He means it!

... but here in the real world, we know that Jesus never existed, Christianity is morally bankrupt, and we can no longer 'honor the diversity' of people who think their imaginary friend (an invisible monster that lives in the sky) gives them the go-ahead for taking a big dump on the whole world and everyone in it. This isn't about distinguishing between the moderate Christians and the extremists; it's about a point-blank, frontal assault on the whole bunch until it is as uncomfortable for them to stay Christians as they make it for us to not be Christians. Fortunately, when you give up Christianity you get guilt-free sex, science, medicine, a sense of humor and a bunch of other good stuff. All you give up is a bunch of contradictory, mean spirited poppycock. Here in the land of the American Samizdat, we fight Christianity. In those places where Islam or Buddhism are more powerful, those people will be fighting their own battles.
posted by Trevor Blake at 8:25 AM
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